From one strategy move to another strategy…talking about aim, resolution, destination, determination and so on but all of these things are useless for me. Now I’m 23 years old and I can say that until now my life always in a moderate level not too in high ranking but not to be the lowest. The reason why I’m telling about these things because I was really envy to some of the person that always can be the best in what they are doing. I know there was not anyone false but 100 percent are because of my attitude. Some rumors said that our attitude is come from our house which means how our parents entertain us from the beginning. If that were true, why both of my sisters manage to be the top of what they are doing and lead to a good life. So it is totally come to me.
Actually I think one of my biggest problem is I cannot do what I’m saying. I said, wrote my resolution but lastly it turns to my mundane life again. Then the second things are I am too arrogant with myself. Sounds weird, wright? I am just a medium type person but feeling myself are the best of the best. What a shame on you!
Everyday I’m trying to figure out my problem and try to find a way to solve my problem and lastly I jot it down either on a piece of paper or on my notebook or worst case scenario, I jot it here. But what I’m doing for action? Nothing!!! Maybe for the first, two or three days I am being a positive person and pacing toward success but then…come back to my old life!
So that is why in Islam, it put the values of Istiqamah which means continuing or all the positive deeds that you do, must be in your attitude not just write it and at last the product is nothing, just same like before or maybe worsen! So after this my core value of my life is ISTIQAMAH! And will try my best to apply it for the future.
5th Aug 2012(0136H)